Red Oak Diner & Bakery

The number of diners in NJ is staggering. It's one thing that is unique to the state and makes me proud to call it home. Chi and I were riding home from our practice studio Saturday evening and thought it would not be prudent to continue to eat at the Hillsborough Star Diner all the time (even though it's definitely good enough to go back to). Our solution was to plug in restaurants near our location traveling down Route 206. Half way down the list, and only five miles down the road was the Red Oak Diner and Bakery. It was old-school from its stone exterior to its small parking lot and it looked as if it would suit us nicely. As we got closer we started to get our doubts. "Is it closed?" I asked. We got out of the car and upon making it through the door we were greeted by a larger man that I can only assume was the owner. From there, what appeared to be a high school girl took over and seated us promptly (of course she would have, though, since no one else was in the diner). We were both impressed with the waitress' work ethic and attentiveness. Throughout the meal she refilled water, coffee, brought us our check at an appropriate time, and refilled what seemed to be every ketchup bottle in the diner without being told to do so.

I ordered an omelet this time (I know, crazy). It was the Western Omelet and, oh my god, it was by far the fluffiest, tenderest, most wholesome omelet I've ever ingested. It was packed with diced ham, green pepper, and onion. It was as thick as George Costanza's wallet and if they added one more morsel, the omelet would have been impossible to fold. Everything about this omelet was fresh and I'm looking forward to revisiting Red Oak just to try their other options. My home-fries were almost cooked to order. They were nice and crispy on one side, but the rest of the potatoes were plain and uninspiring. The last aspect of my meal, the toast had its ups and downs. The toast was heavily buttered (it's like they all know what I want now a days), but was prepared much too early so as by the time they buttered it the toast was no longer hot and the butter could not melt. Other than that it tasted like the same wheat toast you would get at most other diners. Their coffee did not shine in any way and tasted a little watered down. What can a guy expect ordering it at almost 8:00pm? As far as prices go, Red Oak was able to keep my omelet at $6.75, and I'm becoming convinced that an omelet under $7.00 is becoming a rarity. Kudos.

Sleepy is the word I would use to describe this place. I like to think that all places that seem too quiet always have some sort of deep secret about them- and this one may be an epic power struggle of an extended family over this established eatery. Although...more likely it could just be the economy that has reduced this place to what it is now. Delicious but...dreary.


Below is a panoramic view of the restaurant from our seat.

But as you can see- everything was clean and polished- including all of the stainless steel hardware. (Yes, you do have the clean/polish stainless steel for it to look good). On the television was a Chrysler vintage car auction which kept us entertained as for the majority of our meal we were the only ones in the restaurant. Our waitress along with someone who I can only assume was the cook kept themselves busy to the point of almost being frantic- as if they expected a huge rush all of the sudden. However, we ate from around 8:00 to 9:00 and according to the business card, they're only open until 10 pm. Note that later when we paid and left, we talked to the stationary (also sleepy) partiarch who didn't seem to know what time the place would be open until and said "11-ish". Hmm...

I decided to change it up and order their Montgomery burger (only $6.99!) with the veggie burger substitute.Coming out hot and not overdone like most, with melted sauteed mushrooms and mozzarella cheese on a sesame bun, it was, by far, the best veggie burger I've had at a restaurant for a long time. Seriously delicious asnd satisfying without being too oily or crispy as many places faced the unfamiliarity of cooking a Boca or a Morning Star will end up just grilling the hell out of it. Unfortunately the fries were very unoriginal with a medium cut, and no special seasonings. Chris actually commented that they were reminiscent of the ones in the upstairs eatery at our old Student Union at George Washington University. Didn't try the slaw, but the meal came with one and with a pickle.


Additional info: Hours are a bit sketchy- but their business card says 6am- 10pm daily. Also does take out diners and special occasion catering. Accepts all major credit cards and you pay at the front. The register has acquired a pretty impressive collection of international money, which really makes you wonder what this diner was like in its prime. Come visit, and maybe we can save this place!

Sage Diner

This outing started on Wednesday night when Chi and I decided it was too late to venture up to Hillsborough to practice and, we would therefore need to find a place closer to home to eat (our last meal was over nine hours ago by this point). A quick Google search for "diner + my zip code" brought up roughly thirty locations and we decided to pick one that was right around the corner from our favorite place to get Mexican food. Maybe we thought there would be some good vibes being sent over from El Azteca, who knows. We decided from their website that they looked diner-y enough for us so we hopped into the car and sped (drove the speed limit) on over.

First impressions for me were mixed. When we walked in there was a family of regulars blocking the doorway and talking very loudly to someone working the phone and standing behind the register. The man working the phone talked casually and loudly back to them all the while dealing with someone else on the other line. I expect this kind of laid-back unprofessionalism at a diner when dealing with locals. Chatting is OK. What wasn't OK was how he then ignored Chi and I for while we stood awkwardly in the waiting area. We were eventually noticed by the hostess and were politely taken to our seats. On a plus side, the waiting area was also their bakery section and their display of cakes, cookies, pastries and Sesame Street themed cupcakes was very impressive.

I ordered two eggs, over medium, with wheat toast and Italian sausage. I usually get my home-fries well done but this time I let Chi venture down that path and she'll give you the comparison between our home-fry orders. This is my usual order at a diner, and the only thing that changes is the type of meat when I'm feeling adventurous. My eggs were cooked correctly and my toast was buttered heavily, both things that make me happy. The home-fries were also surprisingly good. They could have used a little more time on the grill (that's how I like them) but for just regular cooked potatoes they had really good crispy sections and they were definitely cooked all the way through, which is proves difficult for some locations (there was one time in DC when a really fancy brunch I went to couldn't cook my potatoes completely). The last aspect of this meal was Italian sausage, which was awkward. It wasn't in link form and I didn't expect it to be since the menu also offered sausage links. But, I also did not expect the sausage to be one long trapezoid of sausage patty. It was hearty, there was a lot of it, and it had a nice black pepper and spice that probably put a little more hair on my chest. Did I mention it was awkward though?

I think I’ll remember this place more for its atmosphere than its food. Which I guess is better than being forgotten completely. The bakery and desert section was huge and the first thing you see when you come in-they’re clearly proud of it as it extends well into the dining area and breakfast bar. For a place with exposed stonework, the inside was rather well-lit and open and unlike the modern-castle vibe I got from the outside. There were real hanging plants in the booth section we sat in, and the window treatments (wooden and cloth Venetian blinds) were new and definitely livened the place up. The music was (unintentionally-?) hilarious. Smooth jazz and piano arrangements of popular Disney-affiliated songs such as “Somewhere Out There” from An American Tail. At the time I had incorrectly attributed it to The Rescuers which was a spin-off, I believe, of The Great Mouse Detective- my confusion just brings to light just how many mouse-related movies Disney put on in the 90s. Anyways, needless to say, when “I Believe I Can Fly” (Space Jam) came on, the booths around us – also filled with hungry, sassy, 20-somethings, started singing ironically along. 

Additionally, our waitress was very pushy and asked us ‘if we were ready’ about three times in less than 10 minutes. She was eager to get us to hurry our meal along, but once the food came out, virtually ignored us. Poor Chris had to deal with my drinking his coffee as well after mine never got refilled. 

The menu is extensive, however, breakfast is only about 1/7^th of the menu space, and it’s shared with the kids menu. It’s a shame that the more traditional food is more downplayed, because overall, the quality was pretty good despite a few quips: I got three eggs with my home-fries well-done with toast as a comparison to Chris’s. My eggs were of varying levels of done-ness. I asked for medium and my first was too runny, my second too done, and my third- almost there. Unlike Chris, even though I do love butter, I thought that the amount that was slabbed on there was too much and made me feel guilty for consuming my wheat toast. Also note that there was no discernible difference between my well-done home fries and Chris’s not well-done.

The dessert selection intrigues me- so we’ll be back to sample some, but besides that, probably not going to be on my short list of favorites.

Additional Info:

Their hours are from 6:00am to 1:00am Sunday through Thursday and until 2:00am weekends. The location is surrounded by hotels and it seems like a nice local diner to stop by if your stopping by and don't want to venture off of a main road. There is nothing on the menu for "two eggs + meat" which in my diner life has been a standard. All meat is a side and will cost you at least $2.99. Piling this on with my $4.99 for the eggs, home-fries, and toast made an eight dollar meal for me, kind of pricey for the type of food.

The Hillsborough Star Diner

We should preclude this by saying that this is was our second time visiting the Hillsborough Star Diner...in a week. It's oh-so-conveniently located less than a mile from our current dance studio which- I have a feeling- will render several future workouts...irrelevant.

I got the sense that this was a notch above the normal diner, larger in size with more seating, a heavier focus on baked desserts, and for some reason an aversion to trucks. There's a large NO TRUCKS sign as you pull in which while I'm sure is for a logistic space issue (the parking lot is not proportionally large enough for its interior) is hilarious out-of-context. Clearly very popular with the locals, the Star Diner boasts a standard menu of all-day breakfast with an extended couple pages of Italian-heavy dinner courses. 
 

For my second time at the diner I once again chose to order the veggie omelet. I know- boring...and a bit expensive for diner prices at $7.99. It's three eggs and seems to comprise of whatever extra veggies are in stock at the time (Wednesday night there was broccoli and Sunday morning it was heavily spinach). Both times it was on the well-done side and comes with the standard hashbrowns/home fries and toast. The omelet itself is nothing to write home about and my only strong memory of it is the fact that my second time included a wayward piece of ham that disguised itself as mushroom. However, my potato on Sunday was extra special as it was well-done on the outside (just as I had asked) but still completely soft and almost mashed-like on the inside. Essentially, it was a potato-omelet to be paired with my main meal which made the sleepy Sunday breakfast feel kind of whimsical and obviously, delicious. For what it's worth, my coffee came out at the perfect very-hot-but-not-enough-to-burn-your-tongue temperature. It's the little things in life.

Our first visit was around 10:30 pm and we were waited on by an apathetic teenager who looked as empty-minded as she ended up being. She immediately forgot my order after I ordered, and she then brought out coffee, dropped some of the creamer, and proceeded to not pick it up. Sunday brunch service was better but not as exceptional as their website claims it is. (By the way- check out the website which claims the diner to "[offer] the elegance and atmosphere of the finest restaurants at a cost that is well within today's family budget").

As Chi's dedicated dance partner and food enthusiast I figured two things when we found our new studio: we're going to be hungry in Hillsborough, a lot, and that since the Star Diner is a hop, skip, and a jump from where we practice, we'd frequent it often. Figuring the latter helped me decide that I needed to break away from my usual diner breakfast. Halfway through the menu I came across the sandwich section which was larger that I suspected it would be. Their options are the standard of most diners until I saw something that is usually reserved for local pizza places, the chicken parmigiana sandwich (served on a torpedo roll). It was two dollars above most other sandwiches at an affordable $7.25. When they brought out the plate I thought I'd be in for something special as the plate (and food) was approximately three times the size of my face. The chicken parmigiana heaping to the point where I couldn't close the roll and had to eat with a fork and knife. It took the convenient nature of the sandwich away; however, I felt I got my money's worth. As for the quality of the chicken, it's breading was crispy and thin, it was slightly overcooked but retained some moisture, proportionally the chicken was much more present than the breading, and it was lightly salted for flavor. Fries were average, some crispy and some on the soggy side. Or zombie-esque waitress that night wasn't too keen on making sure my water glass stayed full.

The second outing took me back to my comfort zone of breakfast. I decided to save eggs for a later date and chose the french toast with sausage ($6.49) and coffee. The diner once again proved its worth with providing the diner with their money's worth of food. The setup for the plate was average (six triangles of french toast and two links of sausage on the side), but the bread they used was the thickest I have ever seen, as were the sausage. Once again I felt as though I was in for a treat. After applying all three packets of syrup (not maple syrup) and using a good portion of my butter I started to eat. A third of the way through the bread I realized it was too thick. The middle was unaffected by the french-toasting process and remained plain bread, which means the star of the show was rather plain. The over-sized sausage left me torn. The texture was some of the best I've ever had (I nice crispiness from the casing), but the taste was much too salty and offered no heat. The food was good enough for me to eat to my content, but not good enough to wait for a second wind to clean the plate. Oh, one last thing, my coffee cup remained happily full through the meal, which was important since it had a nice full, not-watered-down flavor.

Additional info: 

It's open late night and 24hrs on Fridays and Saturdays which make this perfect for an after-partying snack. Although, doesn't that make you wonder where the Hillsborough kids like to party? WIFI is also available if you know, you're the kind of intellectual who likes to work on your blog at a diner. Oh hey- that's not a bad idea! 

Accepts major credit cards; you pay at the front.